My heart hurts today.
Every year on Veterans Day I do two things: (1) I wear military-related clothing; If I'm out and about on
this day in particular, I want people to know that I contributed to our democracy. (2) I make a point to touch
base with my shipmates on Facebook today. Why Facebook? Well, because that's where everybody IS. I don't have
telephone numbers for most of them — and we haven't really needed them... perhaps until this year.
This year is different. We, as a nation, are coming off of probably the most divisive, rancorous presidential
election cycle our nation has ever seen — at least during my lifetime. The past two cycles have been
unbelievable, and today America is perhaps only less fractured than it was in the time of the Civil War.
Regardless of where you are on the political spectrum, I think it's fair to say that Donald Trump brought
with him a kind of political guerrilla warfare the United States had never seen; by pledging to give a
voice to the underrepresented, Trump created an incredibly powerful and passionate conservative base,
who came to question much about the American Way — and questioning the American Way is a true part of the
American Way; we the people are supposed to use it to build a better democracy — a fairer democracy, for
the benefit of all.
This election cycle has also shown us that we the people have NOT used it to build a better democracy.
We have used it to create a gulf between us. Red states are redder; blue states are bluer.
People's rights are in jeopardy; the ugly underside of America is in the spotlight. Moderation
doesn't make headlines anymore; the parties in control of the Senate and the House of Representatives press
their advantages for selfish benefit. Our senators and representatives are the people we elected to debate and
legislate for the greater good.
Sadly, this division has also affected the relationships we share. Facebook has been a place where unfettered
rancor has been aired — people have been unloading their politics on strangers and friends alike, and starting
tremendous fights. People are just far too quick and willing to bare their teeth online these days.
There are people who believe they are no longer served by Facebook, and are leaving for a different social network.
I first got wind of this only a few days ago. Today I found that to be true of a shipmate, and I am selfish for
having trouble with his decision. We used to be in several groups together and always had positive, friendly,
healthy discussions about things. He was a big reason I enjoyed being on Facebook; I am grateful for every thread
we shared. No rancor, no malice. Just thoughtful exchanges. His departure is a great loss to me, and I'm mourning
it by writing.
Today I wanted to remind especially him and other shipmates who have been so passionate about their
politics how much I value them, and the memories I have of having served with them. I'd worked through
a few on my list before discovering he was gone. His departure from Facebook has left a giant hole in
my small world.
This gulf of political ideology is a very deep wound, and all of us must heal. I fear my friend was so
angry or hurt that he closed his account; I hurt for him, and I hurt for me, too. I feel there's a lot
of grieving that needs to happen. Perhaps this is fitting, given that today is the 101st anniversary of
Armistice Day — the day when the Allied forces signed a peace accord with Germany to end World War I.
Our next task, now as it was then, is to rebuild. Veterans Day should always remind us all of how
important peace is. But on THIS anniversary of the peace accord, we should especially think of how we need
peace within our nation — a time to pause and to remember how much more we achieve together than apart;
to remember how much we miss each other while we're in isolation during this pandemic, and to remember —
REALLY remember — the things that brought us together and have kept us together for so many years; they
are worth cherishing, worth honoring, worth preserving, and are far more important than anything else
that could come between us.