Today is the day to look back on the year and be thankful for the many blessings I have.
Much like 2018, 2019 has been a very challenging year.
I learned that the company I was working with was going to allow my contract to expire,
because my position did not fit well with their changing vision. I am thankful I was able
to find a position elsewhere, with a company who was willing to work with me to bring me
aboard, in a position that appears to offer me a future, and my family some stability and
peace of mind.
When I picked up this new job, I learned I could work extra hours for one of our clients,
so Laurel and I devised a plan to use the extra hours to get rid of some debt by the end
of the year. I'm incredibly thankful that we had to the opportunity to execute that plan,
and to get a few artifacts from our suddently-NOT-tax-deductible 2018 move paid off.
The importance of ethics in business was underscored for me a time or two; I am thankful
that, in both cases, honesty won the day.
Kiddo has had a horrible year, at one point spending time in a juvenile rehab facility
to get her Tourette's Syndrome medications changed. It seemed much like she was wrongfully
imprisoned; she saw some terrible things in her week there. I am incredibly grateful for her
beautiful, light-bearing soul. We're at another time of change, moving her off of medications
that have been causing seizures — particularly in the evenings. I am so grateful that I can
be with her to watch her, to find her when she has fallen, and to be a familiar, smiling face
for her to wake up to when seizures happen. She's away for the holiday, and I miss her. Maybe
I'm grateful for her time away, in that she gets to see others in her family and give us a
little time to drop our guard a bit.
This extra saving effort, along with other good decisions, also allowed us to make some small
changes around our home. I'm thankful Laurel and I were able to give each other the gift of
some fresh coats of paint over some of our neutral walls. Laurel's stability in her position
afforded her occupation of the office in our home; I'd been working from home a few days per
week from the kitchen table, then moved into the dining room. Laurel's gift to me was an
overhaul of the dining room into an office of my own, complete with decorating the walls with
various mementos from my military career. I'm especially grateful for this gift, because I
feel I have a place in my home now that has been dedicated to me, as much as she has her space
in the office. I'm also grateful for (maybe) having finally figured out that when she has a
vision, it's my job to just let it happen. Any input I give gets overruled anyway. At least
I stopped her from reframing all of my awards.
I'm also very grateful we've been able to make sure kiddo has a pretty rockin' Christmas
holiday.
But most of all, I'm thanful for my family and for my health. Everything I've talked about
so far all sort of traces back to money and my ability to earn it, and without those, I can't
provide for those I love. The same is true of my health. I'm over 50 now. I'm in the zone
where the powertrain warranty expires, and maintenance becomes more important. I'm thankful
we found a healthcare provider at the start of the year (we had a delay in joining, because
of the awful influenza epidemic here last winter), and I'm staying current. I could do better,
but I'm thankful for what I have.
It seems weird that I mention family last, but without all the other things, I couldn't
support them — and supporting them is entirely the point. I love Laurel and kiddo much much
more than I can relate in words, and I am thankful for them every day. Every. Day. I wouldn't
change a thing about kiddo — I love her with my whole heart with all of her tics and gestures
and laughter and bloody noses. My heart aches for her, but even with all of her imperfections,
she is my perfect child. And Laurel... I am so thankful for her ferocious love. We are both
working from home now — I get to sit in my new converted office and admire her through her
office doors; admire her poise, admire her skill with her people; admire the love they show
her in return. I can't begin to recall all of the ways I'm thankful for who she is, for what
she does, and for what she sees in me. And, I'm also very thankful she has friends who love
her; she was able to take a weeklong trip with them to the coast earlier this year.
So I guess it all comes down to being thankful I was able to take care of my family this
year. We've still some red on our ledger, but we're moving in the right direction.
I've so, so much to be thankful for. Despite all of the downs. We win some, we learn some.